Love is patient, love is kind, it isn’t jealous, it doesn’t brag, it isn’t arrogant, it isn’t rude, it doesn’t seek its own advantage, it isn’t irritable, it doesn’t keep a record of complaints, it isn’t happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things." (1 Corinthians 13:3-7 CEB)
For the last week or so these verses have been lingering around my head. It started last Thursday. I was sitting at work and began thinking "I should read 1 Corinthians 13."
For whatever reason I chose not to read those verses that day. Actually I didn't pick up my bible to read 1 Corinthians 13 until the following Saturday, and when I read these words I felt like someone had thrown a bucket of cold water on me.
I've read this chapter about 5 times over the last few days and each time I realize that I haven't been someone who lives up to these verses. Why is this such a big deal? Because I've always thought of myself as someone who is extraordinarily loving. However, as with most things concerning Christian life, if my life doesn't measure up to what the bible holds as truth than I am not living my life properly. That sounds a bit harsh even as I write the words out. I don't mean that in a "perfection" sort of way, but Christ is my guide for how to live my life. I will never become like Jesus in every way, I am a man and I make mistakes. Setting my life on a course that aims to follow Him is however what I feel is necessary.
Read those verses above one more time. If my actions towards those I love do not align with these verses than I am not really loving those people I claim to love. The text says "Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous..." What does it say about my love for others if I am not patient, if I am not kind, if I am jealous? Does it mean I don't really love those people? I'd like to believe there's some room for error. In other words, I feel it's somewhat possible to love others without being in perfect love according to 1 corinthians 13. Will that love last for the long haul? I don't know. What I do know is that I have never genuinely loved someone specifically according to the text above and still I know I had love for people in my life. I sometimes wonder if it will ever be possible to love someone exactly as it's laid out in 1 corinthians 13.
The most staggering words in the entire text, at least for me, are "love doesn't keep a record of wrong doing...". Is that even possible? In the past, I've always kept a record of the wrongs done to me. Not literally a record, not a list I keep in a notepad in my back pocket or anything like that. A record filed away in the back of my mind that I reflect upon when unfortunate things happen? Yes. At least I used to do that. What I used to do was prepare myself for the same mistakes to repeat themselves. If someone hurt me once before I expected to be hurt in the same way again. It's sad that I keep the people I love in the same position and never allow them to grow or change. And that is exactly what happens. If I keep someone I love locked forever in the place of hurt, in the place of a mistake, in the place of unfortunate circumstance, than I never allow them to change for the better. Said person will not be able to grow in our love outside of their mistakes because I keep them locked in that emotional and spiritual jail.
Now of course the person can change and grow, but in my perception of that person, they'll never move forward. When this happens there are two possible outcomes to explore. A. ) There will be a constant darkness lingering above the relationship and things will always seem like something is wrong creating a sadness inside each persons heart. B. ) The person that made the mistake will move forward towards forgiveness and change in their life. When this happens that person will eventually leave the relationship because the other person cannot move past the mistakes and into forgiveness.
To be honest with you, I am incredibly tired of living my life as a hypocrite of love. Claiming to be in love, claiming to love others, claiming to be an extraordinary lover of people, and not following one single verse from 1 corinthians 13.
So here is the challenge I am giving myself. If you'd like to join me that would be wonderful. You can e-mail me and share how it's working for you or simply comment below. I am going to memorize the verses above. I am going to make them a very real part of my life. And I am going to compare my heart, my love, my words, and my actions to these verses. If what I am doing, thinking, feeling, or saying does not line up with this text than I am not really living my life in love.
Wish me luck and maybe say a prayer for me.
- Cheers.
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