My Father and Mother, the good ones.

As I write this blog I am 26 years old. For the majority of those years I have been very immature concerning a very specific area of life. Well, I have been immature in a few different areas of my life, but this specific area has been the worst. By the grace of God, that area of immaturity has vanished or at least severely been diminished. Let me tell you a little bit about what I am talking about.

First of all, I think the majority of people from all sorts of various backgrounds, age groups, races, creeds, etc. would say their parents didn't exactly do everything right all the time. In fact, most of our individual issues in life stem from our parents in some way, shape, or form.

For myself, as I grew older I began to realize some of the things I lacked in my life. In my elder teenage years I realized I wasn't born with rock hard abs and chiseled body features, something I blamed my parents for. Then I realized I wasn't born with an innate ability to make millions of dollars by selling ice to an eskimo, something I blamed my parents for. I wasn't born with the best athletic abilities, I couldn't throw a fast ball 90 MPH at the age of 12, something I blamed my parents for.
I wasn't born with anything special. In fact, growing up I would admit there was absolutely nothing special about me. I considered myself to be unordinarily ordinary. That was something I gladly blamed my parents for.
You see, they created me so it makes complete sense that everything wrong or unfortunate about me was entirely their fault, right?

I grew older and moved away from home for a few years and began looking back at my life as a youngster. It's funny how distorted the lens of a 20 something can become when gazing into the past. Everything I remembered about my life was my parents fault. The only things I saw or remembered were their faults. I was where I was in life because of something they did or did not do.
I began seeing my parents through that same lens of fault and bitterness. I was so annoyed and upset with them over everything. I could very easily and accurately pick out their faults and their issues in life. Actually, I became very good at pointing out what was wrong with my parents. Unfortunately for me, this talent only became stronger as the years progressed. Did I love my mother and father? yes, whole heartily. Did I honor and respect them? Not in the slightest.

I recently began spending a very great deal of time in prayer throughout my days. I wake every morning to pray the daily office. As I pray, there comes a point in my prayers where I pull out a little book with names of people written inside it's pages and I pray for them. Among the list of names is written "Mom & Dad". For the first week I basically prayed for them using the same lens I had used in the past, the distorted, dirty lens of immaturity and misguided and false bitterness.
One day I opened my book and began praying for the people on my list. As I approached my mom & dad my heart began to beat faster. I started thanking God for my parents and praying blessings over them. In a very strange sort of way, my memory was cleared from all knowledge of what I thought to be their failures. The lens in which I viewed my parents was wiped clean and I could see clearly through a lens of love, thanks, and gratitude.

I am deeply grateful for the parents God chose to honor my life with. It's an odd sort of way God uses things to work together for His good. I believe that had I not been placed into the family I was placed, had I not been given the parents I have been given, I would not be the man I am today. in their strength and in their weakness my parents raised me to be a man that searches after Gods heart.
My parents never pushed me in any direction in life. They never forced me to become a doctor, a lawyer, a teacher, a pastor, or anything like that. They never even tried to force me into what they thought would be best for my life. They gave me plenty of space and time to grow and find out what truth was all on my own.
That is what has shaped me into the man I am today. And that is why I am eternally grateful for my wonderful parents.

I pray that when the day arrives and I become a husband and a father, that I will be at least half the man my father has been. I pray that the love and space my mother has shown me will be ever present in how I raise my children.