Technology destroyed my relationship

I'm beginning to wonder if technology is destroying relationships among people within our society.

I have this friend with whom I get together on a considerably frequent basis. I've begun to notice the quality of the time we spend together, or lack there of.
Most of our encounters revolve around surface level discussion and I would say seventy percent of the time spent together one of us, if not both, have our cell phones out and in use, which leads me to believe the time spent together is not of any considerable significance. This does not represent all of our encounters together, but enough of them.

I went on a date with a girl earlier this year. It was a first date and she was particularly beautiful. The possibility for deep, meaningful, and new conversation was endless. However, the majority of our "date" was spent utilizing the benefits of Twitter, Instagram, and a little something called text messaging. For reasons concerning my ego and pride I would like to admit that I was the culprit of the electronic distractions, unfortunately it was not I. Sitting next to a stunningly beautiful woman and surrounded by perfect atmosphere for first dates that you only read about or see in romantic comedies, I spoke with nervous haste to the air and the emotionless instagram application.
Leaving that encounter I felt troubled, I felt, to some extent, worthless. That an iPhone held more value than my words was troubling to me. That's an unfortunate and very sad understanding in today's society. We all must come to the realization at some point in our lives that an iPhone is far superior and more interesting than anything we are capable of, at least for some moments in life.

Having been on the receiving end of these murderous emotions, and not just once, I am beginning to come to the belief that it is vitally important to spend time with our technology shut off. It's funny that I am typing these words considering I am writing this post from my iPad and wireless bluetooth keyboard and that you will inevitably be reading this post from a computer or mobile device. But I'm not saying technology is a bad thing. I'm saying that when technology replaces real, pure, and sometimes awkward human interaction it becomes a detriment to society, or at least it's extremely unfortunate.

I know people that would prefer you connect with them on Facebook, where you can see how old they are, find out where and when they went to school, see where they work or have worked, you can even browse through their most intimate family photos, yet they would never consider handing you their phone number or sitting down with you for coffee. And no, I'm not talking about members of the opposite sex and dating with that analogy.

I have some friends with whom I can connect with on an extremely deep and spiritual level in conversation. And I have friends with which our conversations rarely go beyond the surface, and when the conversation does sink below surface level, it's typically filled with generic catch phrases frequently spoken by televangelists. These are the relationships that usually involve the most influence from technology as a supplement for the evening and the company.
There is something beautiful and genuine about sitting down and talking with people about anything and everything. I have some new friends of mine that I do this with. I've been to their home a couple times and have had some of the best conversation with them. No cell phone or iPads were used in the process of that beautiful time together. We didn't tweet out what were doing nor did we check in on foursquare. We simply sat on their deck and talked for hours.

When I think about how the church fits into this thought process I become overwhelmingly disturbed. Am I shallow? Do I show up early on Sunday mornings and play my guitar and sing other peoples songs, yet leave not having revealed something new about myself or learning something new about the people in my church? The answer is unfortunately yes. How could church be different if people were encouraged to dispose of their electronic devices upon entering the sanctuary? If instead of sending a tweet or text message I was forced to set an appointment and meet people for coffee.
I have noticed that I have changed the most through relationship with others. I have not changed from reading their status updates or tweets.

So how do I dive into a deeper, more genuine, and more meaningful relationship with others? I believe the first step is to log out of Facebook and Twitter, turn off my iPhone and iPad, and ask questions. Explore different ideas and engage in conversation with others, other people that I would not typically engage in conversation with.